Where did my heart go?

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I feel like my heart isn’t in anything right now; I don’t want to do anything; I don’t want to go anywhere;  and least of all, I don’t want to socialize.  People are reaching out, trying to ask me if I’m ok, and to most, I can’t even respond.  I keep asking myself, “What kind of person am I?”  That I can’t even respond to a simple email, phone call, or text message.

I sort of feel like I’m floating on a raft in the middle of the ocean, and there is nothing for as far as the eye can see.  And I want to be here; out of reach of most anyone or anything.  I’m alone without a plan as to where I’m going, and I just don’t care.  I don’t want to do anything else, except for simply float peacefully along, and leave everything else behind.

I don’t think I’ve ever isolated myself as much as I am right now.  And there are times when I question why I’m doing this.  But I feel like I need it.  The quiet has been soothing to my soul.  I’m loving the peace of not having to talk to anyone, to explain myself, to share all the horrible ugly things that I’m so often dealing with.  I don’t want to talk about any of it because then it becomes real.  And I can’t deal with the reality of the things that I know I will eventually need to face.  I just don’t want to right now.

The funniest thing is, I start a social media communications class next week.  It’s a requirement for my major and one of the last general education classes that I still need.  40% of my grade will be the discussions I have with other students.  So much for being anti-social!  Lol.  At least I don’t have to talk about my personal life, but still…

Anyway, so here I am, floating along.  It’s rather calm at the moment, but that usually means there’s a storm brewing on the horizon.  And even though I can’t see it, I’m sort of securing myself to the raft right now; bracing myself for what’s to come.  I just hope the storm passes quickly if and when it finally does arrive.

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Extraordinary…

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“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, I used everything you gave me.”  ~Erma Bombeck

 

Sigh….. If only there were more Erma Bombecks in this world.  She was an extraordinary woman and I miss her.  ~M


Photo credit:  https://www.libraries.wright.edu/special/ddn_archive/2012/03/22/erma-bombeck/

 

November Writing Prompts

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1. The realm of reliability
2. Seeds of solitude
3. Creatures of curiosity and charisma
4. Blushing brilliance
5. A day of denial
6. Petals and parasols
7. The dream of all dreams
8. Lipstick lover
9. Captivating confines
10. Da Vinci’s canvas
11. Bustling beauties
12. Fresh air, no despair
13. Pennies from heaven
14. Silly Lily
15. Tethered triumphs
16. Brass buttons and bobby socks
17. Magically musical
18. Plastered petticoats
19. Silver sage
20. The ring of enchantment
21. Windows to the past
22. Eager advancements
23. The Dakota plains
24. Slated for the shadows
25. Nervy knights
26. Pulpy snafus
27. Wilted white whiskers
28. Fractured and formless
29. Voided victories
30. Her hero

Here’s what I like to do with the prompts.  Hope you’ll try this too!  And for all of you participating in NaNoWriMo this month, best of luck to you!  😉

To begin, settle into your favorite place in the house with a hot drink to warm your waking bones.  Once you’ve warmed up a bit; grab your journal, a trusty pen, and a timer.  Then, set your timer for ten minutes and begin writing about one of the prompts.  Don’t worry about spelling, punctuation, neatness, or anything like that; just write!  Write about anything and everything that comes to your mind, and don’t stop until the ten minutes are up.

I often find myself writing short stories or poems during those ten minutes, but you can write about anything you like.  And don’t be alarmed if what you’ve written doesn’t quite make sense.  The whole idea behind doing this exercise is to get your mind ready and working so that you can begin your day.  Just think of it as exercise for your brain, and once you’ve done your ten minutes of writing, you’ll feel more prepared to tackle the rest of your day.

As always, I will be writing and posting over on my other blog, which can be found here. So please come visit me if you get a chance, and hopefully I can keep up with all of you!😉

One last thing… don’t forget to pingback your posts!

#MidnightMadness -10/19/2018 – The things kids say…

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Autumn (Age 10)

On the way home from school one day…

Autumn – “Mom, guess what my favorite class is this year!”

Me – “Umm… I’m not sure, tell me.”

Autumn – “It’s History, and guess why!”

Me – “Hmm… I’m still not sure, tell me why.”

Autumn – “It’s my favorite class because it hasn’t started yet!”

*She absolutely loathes History, so this came as no surprise, but it really made me laugh because of her cheeky behavior.  It’s never a dull moment around here.  Is it ever when you have kids?  Lol… 😉