Twenty-five things I learned in 2016…

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With the New Year approaching, I started thinking about the list of things I learned in 2015, and thought I should do another list for this year as well.  So without further ado… here’s what I came up with.

 

Twenty-five things I’ve learned over the past year.

I’ve learned…

1.) How important it is to set aside time to read.

2.) To just be myself and not worry what others might think about me.

3.) Not to hold anything back when it comes to love.

4.) That random acts of kindness are good for the soul.

5.) To never give up on someone.

6.) That my girls really are as crazy as I am.

7.) That I enjoy macaroni and cheese entirely too much.

8.) To be more understanding.

9.) That going to the gym isn’t entirely overrated.

10.) That I enjoy having time alone.

11.) What it feels like to be told that you may have cancer.

12.) How hard it is to recover from loneliness.

13.) Not to push people beyond what they are comfortable with.

14.) That I have a heart for people who need to be cared for.

15.) That I like to have plenty of time to plan ahead.

16.) How having a brightly painted room, can completely altar one’s perspective.

17.) How much I love homemade chai tea.

18.) How girly I really am.

19.) That my house can be messy and I don’t really care.

20.) How a single note both good or bad can affect my entire day.

21.) How quiet my house really is with only two daughters living here instead of four.

22.) That I can’t eat tomatoes or anything spicy anymore without consequences.

23.) That really good job opportunities are extremely rare nowadays.

24.) How in just a few short months, my daughters can be married and gone.

25.) The importance of a true and trusted friend.

 

How about you?  What have you learned over this past year or over the course of your lifetime?


Gif credit: happynewyear2017facebook.com

Dear Santa…

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Dear Santa,

Everyone is starting to tell me that you aren’t really real.  But Santa, I want you to know that I still believe in you.  Don’t get me wrong, I know that the Santa at the mall isn’t really you, but actually just one of your many helpers.  Yet I know you really must exist, because my mom told me that you’re best friends with God, and I know she wouldn’t lie.  God seems really far away, and I’m not quite sure he actually hears me sometimes.  So Santa, could you please give him a message for me?  This Christmas, all I want is for all the sick people in the world to be healed and for everyone to be happy.  Even if it’s just for one day.  So could you please ask him for me?  I wrote him a letter last year, and I don’t think he got it, as it is still on my window sill.  I know it’s a lot to ask, but it’s really all I want.  Thanks Santa, you’re the best!

Love,

Michelle (8 Yrs. old)


I was recently challenged to write a letter to Santa, after I challenged my friend Paul to do the same thing.  You can read his letter here.  The letter above was based on a memory I have, of writing a letter to God when I was a little girl.  I wish I still had that letter, it would be so much fun to read now.  Anyway, hope you are all having a wonderful holiday season, and I want to wish you all a very Merry Christmas!  And don’t forget the true reason why we celebrate.  Love you guys!  ~M  xoxo

Oh the thrill of being a vampire…

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In the spirit of Halloween, here’s the beginning of a short story, that I wrote a couple of years ago.  Enjoy!

Nobody knows my secret and sometimes I doubt who I am myself.  There’s a part of me that misses being human and another part of me that remembers the heartache that human life brings.  The emotional ties to people no longer exist in my current state.  I am finally able to be who I’ve always wanted to be, free of the emotional hang ups that used to rip my heart right out of my chest.  Now I call the shots, I make the rules, I set the stage.  Isn’t this what living should be?  Nobody telling me what to do or how to live my life.  But then, why do I feel so alone sometimes… so lost?  I don’t even care that I just killed an innocent person, I needed to feed and they were there.  It was an easy choice, too easy I suppose.  But isn’t that the thrill of being a vampire?  Taking what you want, anytime, anywhere and never thinking twice about who you hurt.  What more could I want out of life?  And yet, I wonder… is there something more? Am I missing a key piece, to this puzzle called life?  Should I be afraid of who I have become?  I guess only time will tell and until then, I know I will enjoy this deranged way of living.  I can’t wait to meet my next victim.  They always seem so surprised to see me, and I can literally hear their hearts beating right out of their chests before I go in for the kill.  It’s always the same in every person I come across, and in an instant they are free from the agony of this terrible world; this sad, chaotic, frightful world.  So I guess in a way, I am really just doing them a favor, and in return, I get to continue living an eternity of blood lusting bliss.  I do feel some pity for the young ones that cross my path.  But unfortunately for them, my instincts are purely animalistic and I have no conscience either way.  I have hardly any recollection on how I ended up like this.  It seems like a dream that happened long ago.  I may never fully regain my memory of that particular day, but on occasion I do see glimpses of my past.  The images I see are hazy at best, and feelings of emptiness flood my mind as I try to hold onto a particular memory when they do flash by.  I always see the same image, a dark shadowy figure of a man coming towards me, and then in the very next instant, a bright light flashes all around me.  Then there’s nothing… nothing at all.

 

Is it okay to be happy?

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“I often feel guilty for being happy.” ~M

I was once given a death threat by a roommate of mine, who claimed that I was too happy.  She threatened to slit my throat while I slept, because she said I was way too happy all the time.  For some reason my happiness really bothered her.

After spending months in the same room with this girl, she was finally taken forcefully from the barracks, and transported to a psychiatric ward.  She was found to have knives strapped to her thighs, and a suicide letter next to her bed.

I have found it hard to be happy in front of people since that day.  I feel that somehow my happiness only seems to bring others down, who are not experiencing the same joy in their own lives.  Maybe there is still a part of me that fears what may happen, if perhaps I am too joyful around others.  Regardless, I am very cautious now and I doubt that will ever change.

It’s so sad to me, that we live in a world where even our own happiness can be threatening to others who long to be happy themselves.  I wish I didn’t have to feel guilty for being happy as often as I do.  I suppose this is another reason why I find myself wanting to be alone so often.  Secluding myself from others, means that I will never have to hurt them.

Life is so difficult at times, this is just another example of why I feel like I can never fully be myself around others.  It’s a sad state we live in, when we cannot even show our own happiness.


Photo found at: sonalororra.wordpress.com

Whitewater Lake

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Whitewater Lake isn’t far from where I live.  We had such an amazing afternoon there, and so I wanted to share some of the pictures I took.  This was one of the most perfect ways to spend one of the last few days of summer.  My girls had a blast watching the turtles and the muskrats that were floating on the surface of the water.  They even tried to make their own fishing poles while we were there and attempted to catch some fish.  Overall, it was a very fun day and I’m thankful that I had the opportunity to spend this time with my girls.